How an Autism mom decides to do the scariest and saddest thing of her life ...

     

Making the decision for Richie to have a second home ..Part 1

This time last year (it's almost impossible to believe it's been that long ) is when all hell broke loose in all the wort ways possible ......

We were truly at the point of living in unimaginable life that I don't think people would believe it even seeing it ..... We were in a very dangerous place for the entire year prior ... Richie had gotten so strong and wasn't safely manageable in any way ... tragedy could have struck at any moment ... He was breaking glass, broke the living room window with his bare hands, Pica (when children eat anything and everything non-edible from rocks to soap and they seek it out and succeed because they are impossible to stop ) very scary and any moment could possibly be a deadly one .... with Richie you could not even briefly even move your eyes for a split second and hes faster than a speeding bullet and I promise you he puts super mans speed , strength and power to shame !

He would spend the entire day running around the house destroying whatever he possibly could , knocking things down, putting holes in the wall (it's amazing this kid has never had stitches or a broken bone , seriously ) The scariest thing is when he has escaped from the house .... and he would on the hour walk around and check the back the door and front door to be sure it was locked ... if he gets out he is not catch~able and has no fear of anything .... So if we even forgot to lock the door once , tragedy would be eminent .... ( I cannot begin to describe how hard it is to be in that worry and stress 24/7 and be responsible for a child so dangerous to himself ) He broke his closet doors of the hinges and the door to his room . There was nothing safe here , nothing . As much as we tried to keep out of reach , which ended because of his size he would seek out different things anyway ... 

We would spend hours just trying to keep his pants on , over and over and over again.... He's a 12 year old not potty trained . So he had no problem with constantly peeing on the floor . He also did something that so many kids with Autism do and would take his poop out of his pants and if you didn't get to him in time well I don't even want to paint that picture for you . I spent and I'm not exaggerating sadly about 9-10 full hours every week of scrubbing poop from everywhere and anywhere ... 

During all this I had teachers in my house and this could happen while they were here , I cannot describe how that felt , but the girls we had toward the end were so amazing and and understanding about it all , because they were used of it with other children ....There was sadly no teaching because basically we kept Richie alive ... 

All of these things happened for all of the years but the last year was unbearable , there were countless hours I was alone ... and just to keep him safe and sky safe we needed a minimum of three adults in the house at all times (and that was just for Richie ) 

This was relentless 24/7 no breaks and when I say 24/7 that's pretty close because about half the time Richie slept about 4 hours tops .

I'm going to stop here for today :(  this may be graphic but I want to be authentic and real and just bare it all .... If you are reading this you may yourself be going through it or know someone who is and when I finish in part 2  I want to give you the knowledge to be able to reach out and help these moms because when they are in it , it's simply impossible for them to reach out to you .... 

I promise the story gets better , I will be blogging how I got healthy to get through this and how the direct selling industry helped me through ... I will be sharing how I was able to come out of the bottom of the well to a much better place ...

Please like our facebook page , Share on your facebook page , Subscribe to the email list so you don't miss a thing ! I want this story spread far and wide and all of the information I will be giving that can help heal these moms and help people who want to help heal these moms , with the amount of children being diagnosed it's going to be crucial for our society to come together .....

All of my love , 

Maria 

xoxoxoxoxoxo 

Part 2 of : How an Autism mom decides to do the scariest thing in her life ....

June 26th 2013 is a day I will never forget ........

It seems not possible that we are a year into this already ....

Richie's behaviors became so intense that my house was one of the most dangerous places to be , not because he sought out to do harm , but because of his strength and speed and repetitive behaviors . We truly lived in fight or flight for so many years , you know that feeling like you look up and your about to get hit by a bus , your heart races, your frozen .... For me , that feeling was pretty much 24/7 . In the end after school I would have me , my mom and 2 ABA therapists and we could not altogether get Richie under any kind of control. I raced 24/7 like a marathon runner trying to keep up with house work ~ Keep organized (not an option to not be organized due to our fast paced life and Richie's pica , was a life or death) Basically we had a no parent family , Luckily for my oldest she was away at college for the worst years , but my poor little Sky a beautiful strong little lady always being left out completely because we couldn't take our eyes of off Richie ....So the day came that I knew was coming for so long , the day I did everything in my power to prevent , the day that was my biggest fear and worst nightmare I had ever Imagined ...

I called somewhere that escapes me right now , I told them what was going on and they told me I needed to call crisis to have Richie admitted to keep us safe (Sky) She said if I didn't call they would come take my little Sky  . .... He had gone after Sky that day  ....  Crisis came as they were evaluating the situation Richie bit me in the shoulder and good .... And so the Journey began ... Richie was taken away to Baystate Medical Center  by Ambulance ( btw the effin suck when it comes to Autism , when Richie needed to go to the ER I drove him to children's) He got there and they put him in the adult psychiatric ward to await a bed that would be either in Hampstead New Hampshire , or Rhode Island ... It was a complete nightmare we were in a square plane white room with just a mattress on the floor .. I was told it could be 2 weeks before a room opened up and he would have to stay there to wait for the insurance to cover it (which turned out to be wrong ) So I said I am taking him home to await an opening .. They in turn said they would report me so I said go ahead .. I removed Sky from the home and Rich stayed home to protect me , so we took him home . Crisis was amazing and got Richie a bed in just a couple of days Alrighty then , I guess we will have part 3 because this is all my heart can handle for today .......

I know this seems very very sad and it is but this is not just our story ... this is how countless people are living everyday with no hope and no help ... I want to bring awareness and open up as many people as possible to the reality so that wherever you  may be I promise there is someone , or something you can help with that will make a significant impact in their lives ... I will be creating day of serenity programs , not just for Autism moms but for all women . There is hope and there is help . Together we can create great change ! 

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